:: im in good hands ::

a friend once scolded me for having 'nothing-in-life'. at that time, i was unemployed (quit my last job), i was having relationship issues (major unforgiven behaviour. bitchy me eh? LOL) and i was 32 but i looked like someone who is 45. teruk giler. i felt shitty inside yet being an honest friend she was, her tarbiah wasn't helping at all. i had #GGBEBS but it was managed by Sue so she said that didn't count. i didn't have a house of my own. i didn't have a car of my own. i didn't have a job. i was practically living but not happy. she scolded me like any other bestfriend would. you know, rubbing into my face all the things i didn't wanna hear. comparing them to hers and other friends. i hit rock bottom. did i mention this was on new year's eve?

i didn't cry. i said thank you and hugged her before we both went to bed. i didn't sleep at all that night. i keep thinking about what she said. asking me to decide what i want in life. memang la aku krik-krik moment wehhh...im a Gemini. i never know what i want in life (literally speaking)..haha! that friendship bonding moment we had was one of the strongest i ever felt. now, we're no longer friends. i think she disapproved who i chose in life. haha. we drifted apart and masing-masing dengan life masing-masing.

i didn't have any regrets back then. because secretly i knew i just had to hit rock bottom. faced my problems and fix myself on my own term. i chose who i wanted. im still with the one who i wanted. i got lucky i am loved incredibly. 

i still don't have my own house. i never even wanted to buy any in Malaysia anyway. i still don't have my own car. im flexible and any mode of transport is fine with me...what i have now is Luvtanya Enterprise. it's already my third year doing tourism business. (i shall write about it soon!!) alhamdulillah...we travel often. so far LVDV is my best backpacker-teammate. dia carry the backpack, i carry myself *flips-hair* hehe. it's been awesome being my own #GIRLBOSS. amazingly more business to come in the near future. inshaAllah. 

life has been nothing but great. LVDV is with me all-the-time. we help each other in each other's business. (yups..dia pon boss sekarang. who knew eh?) it is not as perfect, of course la ada hiccups but as always, face those problems and work something out. my favorite time of the day with LVDV is anytime when it involves hot coffees and discussing about US. love, life, plans and other fortunate events. how we both are looking into the same future direction. ignoring everyone else and just be in OUR world.  i am grateful that i am in good hands. 

so to my dear friend, i really don't know if you're gonna read this (but some of your friends will), i never forgot what u said. that's the only part of you that i have hold close to heart all these years. i think i dare to say, i have made u proud. u know, if we were still in touch. shessh..we could've travelled sesama pon! sayangnya it's not your rezeki for me to share my part of rezeki with. as much as i want you to be my forever friend, i have accepted the fact u only existed for a reason. nevertheless, THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart. 




1 comment:

do u have anything to say, luv?